"Say You're Jar Jar Binks."
Well, no, why would I want to say that?
It's the guy one table over. He's talking to this cute girl. I suppose he could be setting ground rules for foreplay, but I'd rather believe he's telling her how to play some Star Wars RPG. From the sounds of it, it's very D&D-esque. I know the babes must swoon to his every word.
I can't talk. I'm not much of a swooner either. I'm not a musician. I'm not chiseled like a Roman Olympian. And even before the divorce, I wasn't rich. Yeah sorry. That noise you just heard was my readership dropping.
See? I'm Rob. That's kinda it. I'm not bagging on that. I'm happy being Rob. I don't know If I could be happy being anybody else. Maybe that's why I never got into role playing games.
"So Kirk was playing. He was a fighting a red power orb, and Obi Wan felt him through the force and came to help him out. It was so cool!"
Felt him through the force? I guess Jedi's have a don't ask/ don't tell policy too.
OK, so yeah, I did do my time in the Dungeons and Dragons basement lair, but I always kind of played myself. (that's not what I said pervs!) It was sort of a "What if I spent my morning speaking Elvin rather than learning Greek?" Hey, college is the time for experimentation. Yeah by the time I figured out I was supposed to be experimenting on something other than a 20 sided die, I'd graduated.
Still, Jedi-boy's got the Jar-Jar-girl's full attention. She's laughing. She's smiling. She's interested. What the hell? Maybe she really wants to be his Jar Jar Binks. If this guy had a clue, he could be her love wookie, but I don't think he gets it.
It gives me hope. This Star Wars geek isn't that different from me. Oh, my force burns way brighter than his, but I'm just as oblivious to the Jar Jar sex.
I think that scares me. I'm going to go back out there and I'll be find some cute blog groupie who hangs on my every word and I won't even get it. I'll see her interest as purely academic. I like words, she likes words. I'll miss something cool cuz I'm reading Braille.
I know, I know, I'm worrying about this stuff and I don't even have a groupie. I've put the dozer before the bull, or something like that. It's just who I am. I overanalyze everything. I'm really not that different. Oh I'd never ask a girl to be Jar Jar Binks, but I could see a little Princess Leya thing going on.
Help Me Robby-Wan, you're my only hope…
"Yeah, baby!"
"Uh, a Jedi wouldn't say that."
"What about a Dark Lord?"
"No, I think that's a Redneck Sentinel thing."
"Works for me…"
"Sorry, a girl has her standards."
That's always been my problem: Girls with standards. Still I have hope. If I can keep that up, I'll be like the Star Wars boy. Ok, maybe not that…
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