Life is about community. Community is not about the string of 1200 ft hovels surrounding my glorious stucco palace with its well exposed back yard and curiously obedient canine. Although the curious canine without curiosity for his environment is part of my community.
That dog won't leave his yard no matter how many wood walls the big bad wolf-wind blows down. He's a stay in his imaginary box kinda guy. Mime Dog. It explains the white make-up. I hope he didn't learn that from me. He won't eat out of a bowl either. In fact, he eats his food in a circle, like he's unraveling a Science Diet chicken and lamb chunks cinnamon roll. I know I didn't teach him that. I blame MyUnwife. She was part of his community. She was part of mine too. We learned a lot of things from her. Some of them weren't bad. None of them will I give her credit for. Ok, I'll give her credit for the bad.
That's what community is about: Plagiarizing the good, blaming the bad. All bad belongs to the excommunicated.
"Do you know what MyUnwife did?"
See? It doesn't matter whether or not she did it. She's no longer part of the community. Who's gonna fact check? You can fact check this: It's taken a long time getting used to a community without her. She was here for a long time, and her exodus was biblical.
"Pharaoh Rob, let MyUnwife go."
"Ok."
"Uhm...You're supposed to say 'no.' I have this whole water to blood thing planned."
"Yeah, yeah, you've been part of my community for a while. I've seen it. Impressive. Go ahead and go."
"Frogs? I do frogs."
"I saw a donkey show on the internet last week, frogs aren't impressive."
"Rain them! Rain them, you freak! I Rain frogs."
"yeah, rein. That's what they did with the donkey too. Still not impressive. Although I do suppose they'd look cute in their little tack and harnesses. Do you race them? Where do you find the jockeys?"
"OOOHHH! I am so striking you with a plague of gnats!"
"Gnats? Oh, well that line stars over there behind my third grade girlfriend. She has lice…"
That's when she huffed out. Still, she didn't leave the community until she'd plagued my kingdom with gross neglect and animosity. Or was that in my gift basket to her? It's so hard to tell from this side.
People don't abandon communities because they love their lives and the people around them. Things in the community are not to their liking; any other reason they give is superfluous. So she packed up her gold, jewels and her animals, and left. It didn't take 40 years, a tribe, or a miracle of God, just 150 bucks, three starving students, and a moving van, to relocate. The denizens of milk and honey: that's her new community.
My community is my dog. Oh don't look at me that way! I was taking a breath, there's more! My community are all those who contribute to my life:
"I regret to inform you that I am not the slip n slider you thought."
"I'd probably be strangely flattered if you plagiarized me!"
"You're luckier than Steven Segal."
"Reach into his jacket and pull out his heart."
This is my community. My community gives me their voice. My community is a place where things go wrong, but there's always somebody monitoring just a modem away, trying to make me see the good. My community, a consortium of strangers, not afraid to reach out. I like this place. I like it's people. Thanks for being part of my community.
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