"well, now it's time to go…"-Foxboro Hot Tubs

My name is Rob. You probably got that from the other blog entries. If you're at D360, the blue nameplate beneath peachy headless avatar man was probably a dead giveaway. Well, not so dead, but you get the idea. So why am I stating the obvious? It's an homage to a TV show that ended last week.

What? I've paid taxes, tolls and "the price" I can pay homage once and a while--or is that once in a while? I mean, is it one once over the course of one while, or is it one once. plus one while? I'm just asking, and while we're on the topic, how long is a while? I never could get a straight answer from my mom on that one.

"When can I go outside?"

"In a while."

"Is that a once, in a while, or will that be several occurrences over the same while, Mom?"

"What?"

"Nevermind, you're part of a blog flashback, you wouldn't get it…"

I think it's safe to say there are several things my parents just didn't understand about me. MyUnwife too, but I pay them enough homage, this is about a TV show.

My Name is Earl. Did you watch it? It was great because it drove through moral quandaries that splashed mud in all our lives and makes us laugh at the messes we've caused. I don't know about you, but I see a little me in all the characters, even Randy the slow brother.

Earls taught me about a lot of things though, bagging groceries, approaching a one legged girl, and how to jump for Joy. Last week it taught me about marriage and divorce.

"Somebody help! My hooker stopped breathing!"

Ok, that wasn't part of the marriage lesson, but it set the mood. See, Earl got married to Alyssa Milano--yeah, train wreck, thy name is Earl. Some fruit is purely ornamental, and should never be eaten. It's ok, it's a lesson we all need to learn.

Earl thought that they'd been united by Karma, but found out through several misadventures that maybe that wasn't it at all. He even reaches wisdom we all have encountered from time to time: "That’s all marriage is, Accepting all the annoying crap your partner makes you put up with."

Preach on Brother Earl!

In the end there's a "happy" divorce where Alyssa sets Earl free. Now this was one of the few things I found unbelievable about the whole episode. No not the "happy" thing. It happens. Some people just realize they don't belong together, and that the universe will be a happier place if they don't unite. C'mon, you saw that Star Trek episode didn't you? Matter man meets anti matter man? My gosh! What did you waste your education on?

Shesh!

Anyway, she pulls out this divorce paperwork for Earl to sign and it's like two pages. Two pages? Come on! You mean to tell me a whole set of studio folk and nobody knows what a ream of divorce papers looks like? (yeah, that's the only way divorce papers are served: in a ream. Sorry, my bitter is showing…) now that is incredible! I've seen parental permission slips longer than the slip she handed him to sign.

Still, if you could get past the slip, you watched Earl and Alyssa move on. It was a simple slip out of love, out of love. I hate to see anybody go. MyUnwife, Earl, anybody. Still in some cases it has to happen. Maybe it's something we've done, maybe it's something we'll never understand, but all roads eventually lead to goodbye. Some are sad, some are happy, but each has an end. I know, deep huh? That's the last lesson Earl taught me.