Translating my Life

So check this out. I was assembling a piece of Ikea furniture. We've all done that, but unlike you, I like to read the directions first. Oh, don't worry, I'm not going to follow them; I just like knowing what they think I should do. Sort of like a fall back plan should my assembly efforts fail. Thats when I discovered they wanted me to do more than I was prepared to do:



I've been told I have a split personality, but I've never had one recommended for throwing together furniture.

"I need a hammer."
"No I don't."

I'm not sure why this is supposed to work, but they think it works. Luckily I never follow directions...